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Matthew Fox’s above memoir entails his journey from boyhood to priesthood in the Roman Catholic Church, to his expulsion from the Church, and to his
second ordination with the Episcopal Church.  And, that’s as far as I’ve read. Read the rest of this entry »

“You do know that your tumor is malignant, don’t you?”

This is how the oncologist informs me of my condition on December 23, 2011.  After the initial shock, my qigong breathing kicks in, and I recall that the Chinese character for crisis is the same as the one for opportunity.*

Slowly breathing in and out, I make a real effort to remember this as my children, Jennifer and Matthew, and I absorb the news that I have cancer.

This is my second bout with cancer. 1994 ended with a dx of  a malignant polyp in the colon.

This time, the dx is a malignant gastrointestinal stromal tumor, one that appeared at the end of Nov., 3 days before I am due to fly home from my year’s sojourn in Bali and Singapore, back to the U.S.

I now know that this tumor is a slow-growing one that just decided to suddenly pop up. It reminds me of the Taoist Qigong Masters’ stipulation that the disease is inside the body for a long time before the symptom appears.  And, so, this may have been inside me the whole time I was away in Bali and Singapore all of 2011, and I didn’t know it.

Even as I remember crisis and opportunity, at the same time, I wonder how I am to deal with yet another trauma in my life!

Read the rest of this entry »

Now, that is a very interesting question. I find that particularly so after reading what the Dalai Lama says about humanity.

We are taught to survive, but is that living?

Don’t think we can answer that question until we look at the concept from which our society is built – SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST – Herbert Spencer coined this phrase following Charles Darwin’s work on “natural selection” of the species, stating “let the strongest live and the weakest die”.   Although Darwin was referring to those w ho could adapt best to the local environment, “survival of the fittest” came to mean “survival of the most physically fit”.

Now that we are more advanced, it doesn’t seem to mean the most physically fit, but to mean the ones who excel in competition, who supposedly start out with a “silver spoon” in their mouth – family money and connections which means the best education, health care, transportation, etc.  With this wealth and these connections, they learn from an early age that they are entitled, that money buys status and power, even the power to sidestep laws that bind the masses.

Inadvertently, this concept has produced a culture of competitiveness carried to extremes – a society based on exclusivity (if one is not seen as one of the fittest), a society built on the belief that we must fight for our survival, so when one is not part of the “fittest”, one is seen as “the other” or those who are the dredges of society and, therefore, not fit to receive the benefits of those who are fit.

It sets us up to fight – something that violence and wars have shown throughout history.

We, in short, don’t know what living means, let alone know how to live. Read the rest of this entry »

Even as I am immersed in my soul’s journey in this tiny peaceful island of Bali, I need to stick my head out and see what’s going on in the rest of the world. Read the rest of this entry »

This is the skyscraper view I see of Singapore the first night from my cousin’s living room window!


What does “turning point” actually signify? A change in one’s life? A place where one is between two paths, but is in neither? And, what does this have to do with trauma? I explore this concept because unbeknownst to me at the time, and altogether unexpectedly, Singapore becomes my “turning point”. Read the rest of this entry »

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